


Thoughtless Outburst

by chokosnails



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Bisexual Lance (Voltron), Gay Keith (Voltron), M/M, Pining Keith (Voltron), Shiro with a heaping tablespoon of Sibling Support, because if anyone's gonna capitalize off of my own dumbassery, it's gonna be me, keith experiences Regret, rated T for the occasional Fuckword, this is based on some really stupid shit I said
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-20
Updated: 2017-05-20
Packaged: 2018-11-02 17:57:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,732
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10949760
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chokosnails/pseuds/chokosnails
Summary: Keith has trouble dealing with his crush and decides to do something about it. Unfortunately for him, it goes so much worse than he could have guessed. What happens next will warm your heart <3





	Thoughtless Outburst

**Author's Note:**

> Like I said in the tags, I wrote this all because of this really hecking Dumb Shit I said to my own crush. You will know the cursed ass line when you see it, trust me.

It was a simple mission, not different from any others. There was a distress call from a speck of a planet that, like so many others, was being exploited by the Galra. The paladins of Voltron arrived on the scene and ran the few Galra there out of that planet’s atmosphere before Allura landed the castle-ship. Keith hadn’t expected the battle to end before it really started, but he wasn’t complaining. Allura’s voice came through the intercoms while the lions were heading to the ground.

“Is everyone alright up there?”

“All good here, Princess.” Shiro answered. 

“How could we not be? There were like, two ships and they both zoomed off before we got the chance to go after them.” Lance said.

“Yeah, why was this place so dead anyway?” Pidge asked, “We’ve been to smaller planets that were more heavily armed.” Keith heard a thoughtful hum before Hunk added his concerns.

“You guys don’t think this is another trap, do you?” he groaned, “I wouldn’t be surprised. It feels like no one can catch a break in space.”

“Not to worry, Hunk,” Allura reassured him, “Coran has informed me that this planet contains no notable resources, and it’s likely that the Galra were only here to add yet another planet to the growing list of others they have at their disposal. It’s called Priae and it served as a sort of rest stop for travelers and tourists before the Galra came,” the lions each made their landing, “When they arrived, they did not allow anyone to enter or leave, so many of the beings here have not seen their homes in quite some time. We will be spending a while here to explain our presence and help those in need.” 

Keith nodded, and then forgot that he was not yet visible.

“Copy that, Princess.”

He stepped out of Red and onto the surface of the planet, surveying the tangerine-tinted landscape and the approaching figures who he assumed were the detainees under the Galra here. The rest of the paladins followed suit while the crowd neared and seemed to become less hesitant when they realized that the frighteningly large robotic lions had chased away the actual threat. Coran stepped closer to the lions.

“Alright, everyone, from what I’ve gathered, there seems to be no major government or society on this lonely little rock. For some reason it’s not the type of place to get any long-term visitors.” He said.

Keith sighed as subtly as he could. As important as he knew diplomacy was, he didn’t like hanging around the leaders of civilizations for too long. Mostly because this meant that team Voltron would be required to attend celebrations, feasts, or other gatherings with the people they just saved. It’s not that he wasn’t grateful for the appreciation they received, he just became quietly antsy in large social situations. And it was always awkward when he accidentally intimidated one of the naïve aliens who tried to strike up conversation with him. His momentary relief was interrupted by Coran. 

“It seems that these beings have been retained here for quite some time and neglected by the Galra.” he said, reading off of the distress signal, “Our next task is to collectively distribute sustenance and medical assistance to everyone we can reach.” He signaled for them to follow him into the castle ship, “We want to put them all at ease, so don’t hesitate to mingle and be friendly with them! It’ll go a great deal to affirm our position as the good guys here.”

The team all gave calls of agreement as they made their way up. Keith stayed back for a moment. Well, he thought to himself, there it was. “Mingle”, the pesky little word. If he could only speak normally to these aliens in such a way that it ebbed at their fear, he’d be golden. Just as he began to rehearse lines like “You’re safe now,” and “You have nothing to worry about” so he wouldn’t jumble them later, he felt a hand land on his shoulder. The weight of it was entirely too familiar and he grew warm before he even shifted to see Lance looking at him, mildly concerned.

“Hey, Earth to Keith? Coran wants us inside, you coming anytime soon?” When he saw Lance quirk his brow at him, Keith turned away, hoping he was fast enough to hide his probably pink cheeks. 

“Yeah,” he mumbled, “I’ll be there in a sec.” To his dismay, this did not satisfy Lance, who tilted his head curiously at Keith. 

“You doing okay, buddy?” Lance squeezed his shoulder and Keith took a second to make sure that his voice wouldn’t betray him when he answered.

“Yep,” he said evenly. Lance peered at him for a tick longer before grinning.

“You suuure you’re alright?” he asked, and the teasing edge to his words made Keith wary. “No offense, Keith, but it’s really not a good sign when someone’s /spacing out/ on the job.” He lifted his brows, seeking a reaction. Keith wanted so much to groan and roll his eyes, but all he could do was snort at the terrible pun. That seemed to be enough for Lance to deem him “not troubled” and give him one last pat on the shoulder before turning toward the castle. He tilted his head to the door.

“Race you to the supplies?” he asked, mischief in the curl of his lip. Keith smirked back and, without hesitation, sprinted to the door. He could hear Lance give an indignant squawk behind him before taking off as well, shouting all the while about filthy cheaters and a lack of honor. 

As annoying and inconvenient as it became sometimes, Keith could never fully convince himself that his crush on Lance was more trouble than it was worth. He couldn’t pinpoint the exact moment that their rivalry became much less serious and they developed a genuine friendship. He could, however, remember in full detail the moment the wind was knocked out of him with the realization that he was farther gone on this ridiculous boy than he would have hoped. 

Liking Lance nearly /was/ more trouble than it was worth, but that was, mostly, through no fault but his own. The effort it took to reign in his emotions and remain visibly calm whenever Lance did something terribly endearing could constitute a workout. And the overwhelming wave of affection that smacked him whenever Lance so much as flashed him a smile was brutal. How tragic was it that Keith “unfazed by anything” Kogane could be reduced to shy smiles and chopped sentences by some boy? Keith reached a stop next to the other paladins and Coran and looked back to Lance over his shoulder.

“I win,” he said, not even trying to mask his smugness. When he saw Lance’s mock-offended expression, his smile only grew.

“Ex-cuse me? You cheated! And I know for damn sure that everyone here witnessed your foul play, so I win by default. Right guys?” he asked.

They all chose this moment to turn their backs on him like the true friends they were.

“I don’t know, Lance,” Shiro crossed his arms, “I didn’t catch the beginning of that race. I can’t say for sure that Keith cheated.”

“Hey!” Lance said. Keith snickered.

“Sorry, buddy, I’m with Shiro on this one.” Hunk said, without a drop of sympathy.

“Come to think of it, Lance,” Pidge squinted at him with a far-too-innocent cat grin, “how can we be sure you’re not just trying to frame Keith here? For all we know, you could’ve cheated.” As soon as Lance threw his arms up, the rest of the team broke out in laughter. Keith felt dangerously close to calling the pout on his face cute.

“Wow! What did I ever do to deserve this type of cruelty? And at the hands of my so-called “friends” no less,” he huffed. Coran patted his head gently.

“You’ve no need to get riled up, Lance! I can assure you that no matter how your fellow paladins may betray you, I will vouch for your word.” Coran gave a loud “oof!” and found himself with an armful of grateful paladin.

“Coran, you’re the only one I can trust out here,” he shot Hunk a glare with no het behind it. “Even my bestie won’t hesitate to throw me under the bus.” Hunk, still laughing, moved closer to Lance, a hand over his heart.

“I messed up, dude.” he sniffed and wiped away a fake tear, “Can you find it in your heart to forgive me?”

Lance scrutinized Hunk for a tic before reaching out toward him and bringing him into an embrace along with Coran. Keith felt a slight bubble of, honestly senseless, envy in his gut.

“Bro, you know I can’t say no to that face.” Lance spoke into Hunk’s bicep. Allura was approaching the group to interrogate them on their delay with the supplies, but all her prepared questions evaporated once she caught sight of the team, half wrapped up in arms with each other, and the other half with varying looks of exasperation and amusement on their faces. Her lip turned down, almost in a pout.

“Oh no, did I miss another one of those “bonding moments”?” she asked, dissapointed. Lance waved her over to his posse.

“You’re just in time to catch the tail-end of it, Princess,” he called invitingly. Frown transformed into a broad smile, Allura abruptly rounded up Pidge, Keith, and Shiro and dragged them over to the other three. Without enough time to assess the situation, the paladins plus Coran were subjected to a warm, bone-crushing group hug at the mercy of their Princess.

“It’s always so nice to become closer to each one of you!” she gave them one more squeeze that very nearly cut off their air supply before letting them all go limp. “We really should continue this /after/ we finish distributing necessities to the aliens we’ve not yet introduced ourselves to.” Smile bright as ever, Allura marched off to greet the newly freed occupants of Priae and assure them that, no, the lions were not here to eat them whole.

Keith coughed a few times and staggered against the wall, trying to regain control over his limbs. No one else seemed to be doing much better. In fact, Lance was on the ground himself, struggling to become vertical again. Without thinking, Keith walked over to him, kneeled, and offered him a hand up. Lance accepted it with a groan that either meant he was thankful or had a bruised rib. Just as Keith was congratulating himself for not turning into a mess at the contact, Lance shot him a weak, and still unfairly pretty, smile and all that progress went down the drain.

“Thanks, man.” He took a deep breath, let it back out, and winced.

“Not to sound ungrateful for her friendship, but I think Allura could stand to remember that humans are pretty soft and vulnerable compared to her.” Everyone, even Coran, made a vague sound of agreement. “And there’s no Life Alert in space, so what would we do if the power of her friendship ever popped our kidneys or something?” Keith chuckled.

“The pods are probably the next best thing.”

“True.”

“You okay?” Keith asked, hovering even after Lance could stand on his own.

“Yeah, I’m good. We should definitely go get those supplies out right now, though. I don’t want to have to find out about that kidney thing first-hand.”

He went to help Hunk up off his position on the floor. Pidge and Coran leaned on each other for support and staggered toward them. Shiro had recovered, but still rubbed his right side slowly with a mostly fond, somewhat weary look. Lance, Hunk, Pidge, and Coran strolled to the supplies, chatting along the way. Keith hung back to give himself a moment to get his rabbitting heartbeat under control. As soon as the four had entered a separate room, Keith heard the dreaded sound of a throat being cleared, too pointed to be subtle. He groaned quietly before Shiro spoke.

“Keith,” he started gently.

“Shiro,” he said, feigning casualty.

“I can see you’re not eager to talk about this,” Shiro said wryly.

“Talk about what? There’s nothing to talk about.” Keith crossed his arms defensively. If it had been up to him, Shiro never would’ve found out about his crush for as long as he lived. But between Keith’s transparency, Shiro’s set of functioning eyes, and his “brotherly intuition”, it was only a matter of time. Shiro raised a perfectly trimmed eyebrow at Keith.

“I don’t mean to assume, Keith, but it’s clearly not nothing.” Keith shifted nervously and stayed silent. Shiro sighed, searching for the right words before settling a hand on Keith’s shoulder.

“Look, you don’t have to tell me about it until you feel comfortable enough to do so, but I need you to know that I’m here when you want to spill,” his expression became serious, “It’s not healthy to keep things bottled up , Keith. Talking about it /will/ make you feel better.” Keith pursed his lips for a moment, sighed, and threw his hands up in frustration.

“It’s so stupid!” he pinched the bridge of his nose, “I don’t even know /why/ I like him.” 

“Pretty sure that’s not true.” Shiro chuckled. Keith shot him a pointed glare.

“Let me finish complaining.” He tightened his fists at his sides. “I just. I’ve never liked someone this much before. I feel like an idiot whenever he so much as compliments me. It’s irritating that he has this much of an effect on me. At this point, I really just want to get over it. There are more important things going on that I could be angsting about instead of this.” Keith said, arms falling at his sides.

“First off,” Shiro grinned, “as sorry as I am for your loss of composure, it’s sort of really nice to see that he makes you so happy.”

“Nervous and awkward is more like it.” Keith grumbled.

“Second, maybe getting over your crush without doing anything about it first wouldn’t be the best route to take. Not to be cliché, but I think you should tell him how you feel. We need honesty and openness on this team to stay at our best, you know.” He said matter-of-factly. 

“Tell him how I feel?” Keith barked a laugh. “As if it were that simple! If he doesn’t feel the same, then he’ll reject me and that’ll suck, but it won’t end there.” He began to gesture frantically. “After that, he’ll feel weird around me and things will be weird between /us/ and there goes the friendship that just recently became solid. And when the rest of the team picks up on how we’re acting around each other, they’ll start acting weird, too! Then that whole thing will interfere with how well we can form Voltron, and we’ll find ourselves in the middle of a battle, getting destroyed by the Galra all because I couldn’t keep my stupid feelings in check. Even worse-”

“Keith,” Shiro cut off his rambling before it could get any louder and call attention to them, “you’re getting way ahead of yourself, there.” Keith dragged his hands down his face, briefly overcome with a nasty wave of fear, uncertainty, and hopeless frustration.

“I don’t even know if he’s into guys.” He admitted, annoyed at how put-out he sounded. Shiro bumped shoulders with him.

“There’s only one way to find out.” He said, ever the rational one. “Listen, Keith, your fears aren’t entirely irrational, but it seems like you aren’t even considering the possibility that Lance might return your feelings. You’re hesitating because you want to avoid any negative consequences that could come out of telling him, but you’re also denying yourself something really great.” He gave Keith a sympathetic pat on the shoulder. “You’ll never stop kicking yourself for it if you let your worries keep you from a chance at extra happiness. At least think about letting him know, ok?” he asked with a hopeful lilt. Keith sighed, resigned.

“I’ll think about it. But!” he pointed a finger at Shiro, who had opened his mouth to give some more sibling pep-talk, “I can’t guarantee that it’ll go well! So if it doesn’t, and I’m right, I get to rub it in your face and blame it on you.” The glare he aimed at Shiro broke with a yelp as Shiro ruffled his hair like he was some kind of delusional kid. Rude.

“I wouldn’t mind you calling me the source of your problems if it means that you’ll try to solve one of them.” He smiled benevolently and Keith gagged, just to be obnoxious. Shiro rolled his eyes and made his way to the rest of the team. Keith followed him into the other room. He bit the inside of his cheek in thought while Coran ran through their individual tasks. All he caught was that he was in charge of water, but he was too preoccupied to get much else.

Ok, so, admittedly, his monologue on why confessing to Lance was The Worst Idea Conceivable was a bit… dramatic. Like he’d said, he and Lance were on good enough terms to not let something like this get in the way of their teamwork if he didn’t feel the same. Keith wouldn’t get his entire team killed in combat just because his crush didn’t work out.

Logically, the real worst-case scenario would be making Lance uncomfortable and causing a rift to form between them. He was too nice to just avoid Keith completely, but that didn’t mean they’d have the same connection. A friendship maintained through pity sounded worse than not having one at all. Keith was somehow more afraid of that outcome, because he knew how depressingly likely it was. It was getting more and more difficult to keep this crush to himself, and he knew that, sooner or later, he’d metaphorically, and maybe physically, burst. Either way something sucky would happen, but he had the choice to delay it. 

Dragging out his suffering wouldn’t get him anywhere better, so he resigned himself to the alternative. He took the massive, low-floating water carrier off of Coran’s hands, missing the way Lance was looking at him, a little more concerned than before but unable to catch his attention to ask him about it before he was handed his own supplies. 

Walking out the ship with the others, Keith decided he would just rip the band-aid off in one go. Spill his guts, get rejected, get over it, and it’d be done. That offered him only a bit of comfort, but it was better than humoring the possibility that Lance might like him back and end up getting more hurt than he really needed to. 

It was safer to hope for Lance politely rejecting him, thereby ending his attraction and falling back into their regular friendship. He felt a little more at ease at that thought. Maybe after he got it over with, he wouldn’t have to clench his teeth whenever Lance was flirting with some alien girl. Unfortunately, trying to convince himself that Lance was exclusively into girls didn’t fully work, because of the tiny optimistic voice in the back of his mind that supplied a “but maybe…” every time he tried to guess Lance’s sexuality. He blew out a steadying breath before he started to distribute water pouches to the waiting beings on the planet. He hated to admit it, but Shiro was right. There really was only one way to find out

*

“Yo, Keith!” Lance waved emphatically at Keith a few yards away. “Could you come over here for a tic?”

Keith managed to give out water pouches to all of the planet’s inhabitants and even comfort a few of them about an hour or so after he’d left the ship. There were less than a hundred, which was unexpected but still great. The water carrier he brought out was now empty, so with no further tasks to complete besides mingling, he figured he wouldn’t get in trouble for sticking with Lance. 

He made his way over to Lance, who was standing close to an alien; one of the detainees. He was masculine with pale teal skin, pure white eyes, and longish white hair. He looked a little worse for wear, but still content as he stood there, relaxed and with a genuine smile. When Lance spotted Keith, he waved him over again.

“Keith!” He was contagiously excited and Keith was smiling before he could help it. Lance looked to the alien at his side. “Here he is, the red paladin himself-”he did a little jazz hands to Keith when he stepped up to them, “Keith!” The alien laughed lightly behind his hand while Keith raised his hand a little slowly.

“Hi?” He was confused as to why he’d been given an introduction like this, but willing to go along with it. “I’m Keith.”

“I could tell. From the way Lance has been talking about you, I kind of expected you to be taller.” The alien said, still smiling. Keith was only more confused.

“Keith this is Adaan, he’s one of the people who got stuck on this planet while the Galra were here.” Lance jabbed a thumb to Adaan, who offered his hand to Keith.

“Nice to meet you.” He said. Keith took it and shook.

“Likewise.” He was about to get his hand back when Adaan quickly grasped it between his two, which Keith noticed were very cold and smooth. The force of the action set off alarm in Keith, but Adaan continued before Keith could involuntarily try to jerk away.

“I am so glad that you and your friends answered my distress call when you did!” The earnest look he fixed on Keith almost made him shift uncomfortably. “Not a lot of food left to divide among all of us after being kept here so long, you know? Really, you have no idea how great your timing was. Things were getting pretty tense down here.” Adaan let go of Keith’s hand and sighed, “Some of the more restless ones were making plans to revolt, build a ship out of scrap to get off the planet, or play dead long enough for the Galra to notice.” He cracked a smile.

“Wow,” Lance snorted, “I’m almost scared to think how much further that planning could’ve gone.”

“Oh, you don’t know the half of it! I swear eight out of ten of them were on board with lying motionless on the ground for hours until something happened. And I was desperate enough to hope so, too, since my distress signal was pretty weak.”

“What exactly did they think they were gonna get out of that?” Keith asked, somewhat amused at the mental image the idea gave him.

“Hell if I know,” Adaan shrugged, “but all jokes aside, I wanted you to know how incredibly relieved I am that you all saved us. I don’t know how any of us are going to repay you for this.” Lance quickly waved that off.

“No worries, dude, that’s not why we do this. It’s our responsibility as paladins of Voltron to clean up Zarkon’s messes and help out.” he turned to his left, “Right, Keith?”

“Right,” Keith nodded. Adaan beamed at the two of them.

“That’s really cool of you guys!” he snapped his fingers, “Oh, speaking of cool, do you mind if I ask a little about your lions? They’re amazing!” Pride shone in Lance’s eyes and Keith knew the feeling well. Bonding with Red had made him as fiercely protective of her as she was of him, albeit less aggressively.

“They are pretty great, huh?” Lance looked to Blue in the distance, “Ask away, but I’m warning you, I’m not gonna know too much about how exactly they work since they’re, like, literally magical.”

And ask Adaan did. Question after question, he was unendingly curious and intrigued with the lions and Lance matched his enthusiasm with his answers. This back and forth went on long enough for Keith to feel a little out of place. He wasn’t being asked anything himself, but leaving would probably seem rude. Then again, he wouldn’t want to overstay his welcome and come off as annoying. Keith’s expression remained bland as he worked through his dilemma, inadvertently tuning out the conversation and not hearing when the Q&A about lions trickled into something else. Scientists still baffle over how Keith could have possibly missed the line: “Blue is probably my favorite out of the bunch, but maybe I’m just biased towards its pilot” followed by a faux-confident thanks from Lance. And who could possibly forget one of the more obvious ones like: “With the way you came flying into the atmosphere, I’m tempted to think of you as my- or I should say- our knight in shining armor” to which Lance could only sputter out a bashful comment about his own heroism that tried, and failed, to sound boastful.

And Keith, bless his heart, even missed the greatest proof of Adaan’s intentions when he asked Lance for a way to keep communicating with him and Lance, caught off guard, stumbled for a good way to decline.

“Actually- um. Well, I don’t think I can do anything about that. What with the fact that I live in a castle in space and I think it can only communicate with other ships? No, wait, I’m thinking of Star Trek. Probably. Also I left my phone on Earth and, ah. You’re really cool and all but we just met like an hour ago and I’m not really-”

“Oh!” Adaan said in sudden realization, putting a stop to Lance’s babbling, “That was pretty forward of me, wasn’t it?” he shook his head and laughed lightly. “Sorry, I guess I just went and assumed you were gay, too.”

That right there hit Keith like a block of ice to his thick skull. His eyes nearly bugged out of his head and he became hyper-alert. Holy Shit. This was it. A direct, unmistakable way for him to finally be given 100% crystal clarity on Lance’s sexuality. This could make or break any chances he had. Lance, oblivious to Keith sitting on the edge of his metaphorical seat, only bit back a little laugh and raised an eyebrow at Adaan.

“Oh, really?” he asked, playful, “And why do you think that?”

Adaan caught onto the direction Lance was going while Keith ran through the data from that response in his head. Lance didn’t immediately confirm or deny Adaan’s statement. He did not sound offended by it, either, which was a plus. And he said why DO you think that not why DID you think that. Present tense! But if he /was/ gay, then he would have just said so, right? Right? Keith was connecting these new dots to his mental conspiracy board within the span of seconds and the conversation went on.

“You know what?” Adaan asked, playing along, “I can’t honestly say for sure what it is about you.” He put a hand under his chin and hummed loudly, almost breaking character at Lance’s stifled giggles.

“Is it the way I’ve been walking?” Lance offered cheekily.

“Could be.” Adaan titled his head, “It might be your outfit.”

“What, this old thing?” Lance tugged at the black fabric of the suit. “I don’t think it counts. This is, after all, just my uniform. Not an actual reflection of my fashion sense.” 

“You got me there,” Adaan smiled and blew out a long breath, “I’m stumped. I just can’t seem to pinpoint it. Maybe it’s too general. Maybe it’s just a vibe you give off.” Here they both snickered.

Keith couldn’t fully grasp what the hell they were talking about. You couldn’t just know someone’s sexuality in the way they moved or dressed or what aura they gave off. If only it were that easy! Why was the simple answer to his burning question being dragged out so much? With too many questions and agonies and waiting reactions rapidly buzzing in his head, Keith felt like he was about to mentally boil over. And, in a sense, that’s exactly what he did. His mouth opened through no will of his own and he interjected before Lance could answer Adaan.

“For what it’s worth,” Keith started, not knowing what he was going to say and not knowing how to stop, “I assumed you were straight so I wouldn’t get my hopes up.”

Shit. Holy Shit. Holy God in heaven he really just went and fucking said that. Lance and Adaan both snapped their heads to him, with a couple different layers of surprise on both their faces. That was definitely because of what he’d said, but was it possible they’d also forgotten he was there? That would just add insult to injury at this point. Keith watched, paralyzed with white hot panic and inky black regret, as their expressions changed; Adaan’s to one of sympathy and Lance’s to even greater surprise, with wide eyes and a gaping mouth. Keith couldn’t tell for sure what he looked like. You’d probably need to feel your face to do that, which he couldn’t. For a perfect second, this scene remained completely still and painfully silent. 

Filled with an especially active knack for bad decision-making today, Keith turned on his heel and bolted into the opposite direction. He wasn’t fast enough to not hear Lance calling after him at the top of his lungs, and that only made him sprint harder. Keith’s mind was frenzied with the single, urgent goal of getting the hell away from here, leaving no room for the still-turbulent emotions that he’d deal with once he was a good distance from Lance. Well, he thought bitterly, something like this happening was probably why Shiro kept insisting that it wasn’t healthy to bottle things up.

*

Lance felt like he was suspended in some strange daydream until he saw the near-terror form on Keith’s face before he was off like a bullet. That was enough to kick start Lance’s brain and get his mouth working again.

“Keith! Stop! Come back!” he cupped his hands around his mouth, “KEEEEITH!”

Adaan could only watch Keith’s retreating figure with increasing worry. He was about to ask Lance what the hell just happened, what did Keith mean by that, and where was he going, but one look at Lance’s face was all the answer he needed.

“Oh.” He said for the second time. Only now, the conclusion he’d reached was correct. Lance snapped out of his daze. He was already stepping in the direction Keith had run off to when he called to Adaan.

“I’ll explain later! Probably! Maybe! I can’t make any promises right now! With all the – and everything that just – and he just – he! I feel like my life is a lie! Later!” he finished and then went into a full sprint.

Adaan stood there uselessly for a moment and slowly let the second-hand nerves bleed out of his body. His shoulders began to shake.

“Wow,” he laughed and rubbed his temples. “Good luck,” he said to no one.

*

Surrounded by the colorful wild that the detainees had very recently come out of, Keith finally came to a screeching halt. He leaned against a wide tree and sunk to the ground, taking in gulps of air. He listened to the faint sounds of the nature he was in and his own loud breathing. He was alone. Comfortable with this knowledge, Keith let himself go limp against the tree. He pressed the heels of his hands against his closed eyes and groaned miserably. 

What the hell was that just then? WHY did he do that? The memory of his words made him grip his hair. The look he’d seen on Lance’s face made him hope that he was having one of his worst-case-scenario nightmares. The way he just up and ran from the situation altogether drove him deeper into his pool of self-loathing. 

Of all the things he could have said, he had to unwillingly go with the most unnecessary, sad, and desperate-sounding one possible. He groaned a little louder this time. Keith wished, not for the first time and probably not for the last time, that he had a stronger impulse control. He also wished that the planet they were on was secretly sentient and would swallow him whole. Hiding out in the wild only put the consequences of his actions on hold. Soon he’d have to go back to the ship. Soon, he’d have to go back to Lance and then this crush would receive the final blow it needed to shatter. As much as he’d predicted an outcome like that, it still hurt to have it become reality.

Keith tried to even out his breathing. This was fine. He knew this was going to happen anyway, deep down. Keith inhaled for five seconds, but the steadying sigh that he was supposed to breathe out instead tore its way out of his throat as a low, loud groan that became a near-growl by the end. Just because this was bound to happen didn’t mean that it had to have gone so spectacularly wrong.

So much for remaining friends with Lance afterward. So much for not making Lance uncomfortable and driving him away. Looking back on previous events of his life, Keith really should have figured that his luck would take such a turn. Now it really was over with and Keith had no one to blame but himself, even if he hadn’t had full control of his body when he said what he did. Keith made up his mind that he was justified in wallowing where he was for another half-hour when he heard footsteps pounding closer and closer to him. He turned to see who could’ve found him and his stomach dropped.

“Keith!” Lance jogged up to him and leaned against the tree, exhausted but relieved. “Finally found you. Whew! Dude, I think I asked you this before but are you sure you never wanted to be some kind of professional marathon runner? You went off like a bullet!” he said with a shaky smile, trying to diffuse the tension. Keith blinked up at him before making to stand up and dash off again.

“Oh no you don’t!” Lance shouted, tackling Keith before he could get very far. Down they went in a tumble of limbs and cut-off curses. When they stopped rolling, Keith dug his fingers into the ground, trying to claw his way out of Lance’s hold. One poorly-timed swipe at the ground had Keith’s elbow move far back enough to knock Lance’s left eye. Lance cried out in surprise and brought his hands away from Keith and to his face. Finally free, Keith crawled a safe distance away from Lance and turned to him, face burning with shame.

“Why did you-” his face fell when he when he saw Lance gingerly touch his eye and hiss in pain. All fears forgotten, he moved closer to Lance. They finally made eye contact and Lance spoke.

“How does it look?” he asked, worried. Keith inspected his eye closely for a moment, only marginally soothed by its state.

“Not that bad.” He reached a hand out to Lance’s face, but brought it back to himself hastily when the movement caught Lance’s attention. Instead, Keith motioned vaguely at Lance’s eye. “How does it feel?”

Lance scrunched up his nose in his attempt to wink. Keith wanted very badly not to think it was cute, circumstances being what they were.

“Not that bad.” He managed a smile and Keith’s muscles finally relaxed.

“Fuck,” he sighed, “I’m so sorry, Lance.”

“Hey man, it was just an accident, you’re fine.”Lance said.

“No that – that’s not what I was talking about. I mean, I’m sorry about your eye, too. But I was talking about earlier,” he lowered his eyes, “before I ran.”

“Wait,” Lance’s brow furrowed in confusion, “Keith, just so I know for sure: what you said back there, did you mean-”

“I like you.” Keith had hoped that when he finally admitted it to Lance, he’d feel a weight being lifted off his shoulders. Instead he felt a weight pressing against his lungs, keeping him from elaborating. Not that he needed to, if the way Lance was gaping at him was any indication.

“Holy hell,” he said, “Keith, I-”

“I know it was stupid.” Keith folded his arms and rested them on his knees, “I knew that as soon as I knew I liked you. That’s why I didn’t want you finding out.”

“What? Why? Keith-”

“Because I knew you wouldn’t feel the same. And then I’d ruin our friendship by putting you on the spot and making things weird. I didn’t want you to go right back to hating me again.”

“Keith, why would you say that?!” Lance asked, horrified. “I never hated you!”

“You don’t have to say that just to make me feel better. We both remember how things were between us in the beginning.” Keith said.

“No, you’ve got it all wrong.” Lance shook his head and huffed, “I know I was kind of a jerk to you a while back, but that was before I got to know you. Pretty much all of that hostility was me being bitter and envious and dumb and not knowing how to properly deal with it. But that’s a whole other conversation we should shelve for later. The point is: I didn’t hate you then. I don’t think I ever could.” He turned his gaze to Keith, who felt as vulnerable as Lance looked. Relief washed over Keith in a warm, welcome wave.

“You don’t – that’s-” he shook his head to clear it of any brief delusions, “That still doesn’t change this, though. I still didn’t want to tell you that, especially in the way that I did. And it’d be selfish of me to just push my feelings onto you when you don’t want them.” Lance shook his head frantically.

“No, Keith-”

“Again, I’m sorry. I just hope this won’t change things too badly for us.”

“Dude, Keith, it’s-”

“I’ll get over it soon, don’t worry. Maybe then things could-”

“KEITH.”

Keith snapped his jaw shut and saw that Lance was growing impatient.

“Would it kill you to let me finish what I’m trying to say?” Keith shook his head. “Good.” Lance took a deep breath and collected his thoughts. “You don’t have to apologize for having a crush on me. There’s no need for you to feel guilty for, you know, having the feelings you have. People don’t exactly get a say in who they have crushes on, so you shouldn’t beat yourself up over one. And next time you have a problem to work out, please don’t try to run away from the source of it or elbow it in the face. I’m no psychiatrist, but I’m pretty sure that’s not a healthy way to cope. Also,” he fixed a steady look on Keith, who didn’t try to shy away from the attention.

“I like you, too,” he gently knocked his foot against Keith’s ankle, “dumbass.”

Wait, what?

“Wait,” Keith sat up straight, “what?”

“I like you.” Lance repeated calmly, as if he hadn’t just turned Keith’s world on its ass.

“You like me,” Keith parroted, “You like me? More-than-a-friend like me?”

“Yep,” Lance smiled, “that’s what I just said.”

“You – okay, what the hell? Since when? Why?” Keith asked.

“Oh. Huh. Not long after we became good friends actually. I think it really hit me that one time when I almost got killed on a mission. After I came out of the healing pod, you were there, just waiting for me to pop out. And then I fell and you picked me up and helped me to my room and I said something stupid that I can’t even remember and you just. You laughed,” he shrugged a shoulder, “You sounded so relieved and happy that I was okay and, if I’m being honest, it had me feeling some kind of way. Your laugh is really nice, by the way. I definitely wasn’t expecting that.” Lance said. Keith was struck dumb by the information he’d been give there, especially by the fact that Lance thought he had a nice laugh.

“As far as why…” Lance continued, scratching his head, “Well, obviously you’re a great person and I like hanging out with you and talking to you and making you laugh. Our little ongoing rivalry thing is exciting, too, you know? It’s nice to have you pushing me to improve my techniques in combat and egging me on and vice versa. I also really admire how you can just act on instinct when it really matters and stay calm under pressure. I swear, Keith, you don’t even know how /cool/ you look sometimes. And not just when we’re out fighting or training, either. I don’t know how you do it, but you manage to make most things look cool. It’s like-”

“Okay!” Keith waved his hands to keep Lance from going on. He was still trying to recover from the first compliment. The rest of them all at once had him reeling. “I get it, I get it, thank you, Lance! That, um,” his voice cracked and he wanted, once more, to die, “that’s super nice of you to say, but I think that’s enough for now!” he hoped in vain that his face didn’t look as red as he thought it was. Lance only smiled wider, but his lips took on a mischievous tilt.

“Whaaat? Aw, c’mon, Keith,” Lance said, mock-devastated, “I didn’t even get to your voice, or your eyes, or how cute you look when you-” Keith shoved his shoulder, laughing against his own volition.

“Shut up! God, you’re so embarrassing. You can stop now,” Keith gave his shoulder another half-hearted shove, “jerk.”

“Okay, sorry.” Lance held up his hands placatingly, “That was a bit much. But did I answer your question?”

“Yeah. Yeah, definitely.” Keith blew a long breath out of his nose, “So.”

“So...” Lance said, nerves seeping back into his voice.

“Just to recap: you like me. And I like you.” Keith said.

“And that sure is something, isn’t it?” Lance asked.

“Why didn’t you say anything, though?” Keith needed to know.

“Pretty much the same reasons as you. “Don’t want to drive him off and ruin our friendship and end the world” and all that.” Lance rubbed the back of his neck, feeling sheepish, “Also, and this one’s a little dumb now that I think about it, I kinda felt like you were out of my league? For a while?” A moment of baffled silence passed as Keith stared at Lance.

“That doesn’t make any sense.” Keith stated slowly.

“Yeah, I know, just-” Lance lowered his head and tapped his fingers against his knees absentmindedly, “Before I ever really talked to you, you were just this untouchable legend of a pilot. This mystery of a person who did everything perfectly and… I don’t know. It just didn’t seem like anything would happen between us for a long time.” Here he looked up at Keith through his eyelashes and let a grin take over his face. “Of course, that was before I learned how much of a dork you are.”

“Whatever,” Keith snorted, “It’s not like you’re as smooth as you think you are, anyway.”

“I resent that!” Lance gave a scowl that was really more of a pout. He went right back to looking far too smug for Keith’s liking. “Either way, knowing that didn’t stop you from liking me.”

“Nope,” Keith admitted, smiling, “pretty much the opposite, actually.” That threw Lance for a loop, which was apparent in the comical widening of his eyes.

“Oh,” he started to blush faintly. Keith knew that blue was definitely the best color for Lance, but the shade of red on his cheeks suited him nicely as well. “Well – cool. So, um, do you want to go out with me?” he blurted out in a rush. “I mean, we probably can’t go on an actual date anytime soon, what with our, uh, current occupation. But would you at least want to try this? With me?” He looked so open and honest and scared as he waited for Keith’s answer, which came in about two seconds.

“Yes! Yeah, that ah,” he cleared his throat, “I’d really like that, Lance.” And with that, Lance’s smile became blindingly bright and Keith’s own grin became goofy. Lance surged forward and took Keith’s hand in his own before standing and pulling Keith up with him.

Lance said something about how they should start heading back to the ship before they got chewed out for being gone too long. With Lance’s hand grasping his own, though, Keith found it difficult to absorb everything he was saying. Lance began leading Keith back out of the wild the way they entered. The feeling of his hand was familiar, in its weight and its warmth, and new, in its shape and the way it fit in Keith’s hand. He listened as Lance prattled on about how much Hunk was going to laugh at him for not being the one to confess first and about his suspicions that the mice had known everything from the very beginning and would laugh even more. As Lance talked, he loosely swung their clasped hands between them.

This, Keith decided, was very much worth the trouble it took to get here. He knew, logically, that this didn’t cement anything or guarantee that things would be 100% smooth sailing from here on out. So many things could go wrong, both within and outside of their control, that could end this. But right then, Keith’s fears for the future were greatly overpowered by the affection and joy he felt dancing in his chest. He squeezed Lance’s hand and smiled a little wider when Lance squeezed back. And if both of them coincidentally forgot to let go once they exited the final curtain of trees, well. Neither of them felt the need to voice any complaints whatsoever.

**Author's Note:**

> As you could probably tell, this worked out better for my boy Keith here than it did for me. RIP. Lol also sorry for not posting anything in a literal year. I've been writing, but I don't want to post stuff that isn't already finished, so that's how I ended up with a year of nothing. I'll try to fix that, but the keyword here is TRY.  
> hmu on tumblr or instagram @ chokosnails if u want to chat. Lates.


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